A Day: defined

You know when something just hits you the right way??  You hear the perfect song for your mood?  You read a phrase in a book that clicks?  Or you see a quote that captures the essence of how you feel on a given day?

That’s me today.  This was the quote from Real Simple’s Daily Thought :

“Every day may not be good, but there’s something good in every day.”  (Anonymous) This actually fits my last two days.  I will start by saying I’ve been feeling a bit funky, a little out of sorts, sort of uncomfy in my own skin….but not the whole day. 

The headaches are always the worst….the sleepless nights don’t help things much, my sweet girl has been emotional (read: crazy) and my sweet Mommy’s boy has defected to the boy’s team…..he now only wants Daddy (PS…this breaks my heart into a trillion itty bitty pieces.  When this happened with Delaney everyone told me I needed a boy so I wouldn’t get left in the dust.  Wish I could remember (kick) who gave me this lovely bit of advice).  Yep…no more calling for Mommy.  Coop wakes up yelling for Daddy and you can’t even imagine the dramatic disappointment when I walk into his room.  He says, “No….no….no….I want Daddy!” (and then proceeds to throw his head down onto his arms in pure dismay)  Again.  This. Breaks. My. Heart.  How can my lovely little Mommy’s boy go to the dark side?

But….the silver lining is:  though the days themselves haven’t been so good…there have been moments.

Moments of sheer joy: I had a meeting yesterday that required me to get dressed up….I wore makeup, I was by myself in the car, the radio was tuned to my songs of choice….I felt GOOD…..kind of like the me I used to be before kids, today I actually did some paid work (have to love making a little money!), Moments of laughter (you’d have to read my husband’s Daddy Diary for this) and moments of sweetness:

This was my gift from Delaney.  She knocked on the front door as I started to work tonight to give it to me.

Heavenly.

A little more good in my day: a close friend is feeling better after an injury this weekend, I heard the song “Heaven” by Los Lonely Boys and it always puts me in a good mood, my new cell phone ring (‘Love Song’ by Sara Bareilles), homemade chicken salad, azaleas blooming in my front yard, Memorial Day Weekend plans, seeing other people singing in their cars, a good exercise day, a phone call I’d been waiting for, feeling that ‘job well done’ feeling, writing a letter to someone to get something off my chest and of course, ‘hugs and kishes’ from my little ones.

www.ExtraordinaryMommy.com

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How does she know?

I think children are the most observant lot of all….  And worse, mine feel compelled to mention everything they notice.

Take for example, that my sweet Delaney is apt to throw me under the bus ANYTIME she notices something new: “I love your new shoes, Mommy.” (picture the sidelong glance from my husband) and then there is, “Wow, Mommy…you look pretty….I’ve never seen that new shirt before.” (another, slightly more hostile look from hubby).

I can’t even pretend to watch my diet around the child…”Mommy…why do you smell like chocolate?”  Serioulsy….is this some type of cosmic joke?  For 30+ years (don’t ask) I have operated as an independant woman…(well…at least a portion of that time)  But now, all of a sudden, I have to answer for everything I do (yes, everything) “Mommy, why did you put that book on the counter?”, “Mommy, why are you wearing those pants??”, “Mommy, why are you eating that?”. 

Somehow….I feel as though I operated just fine before…but now I have a mini-watch-everything-I-do-guardian.  And she is THREE.  She has no fear.  She is brutally honest: “Mommy, what is wrong with your face?” (this after a small, but clearly noticeable breakout) And she pulls absolutely no punches: “Mommy…those pictures of you are, well….interesting.”

How in the world does she catch everything????

www.ExtraordinaryMommy.com

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Circa 1988 (AKA My Teenage Joy Today)

Because I feel compelled to show my true colors….because I want you to know that deep down in my heart, I am still 15.  I’m certain this post makes me at least a little dorky….but there are thousands of 30-something women who shared my teenage-like-giggles today.

They are back.

Dare I say they still have ‘the right stuff’.  I know, I know, dork alert…but I actually wished I was in New York to watch them on the Today Show.  I was amazed…but strangely comforted that there were hundreds….maybe a few thousand (mostly women my age) standing in the pouring rain to see their big comeback.  I can’t stand it.  And….many of those women had been CAMPED OUT for 48 HOURS.  I can say that I am not that dedicated. However….as long as I’m dealing in full disclosure, I have to admit 3 things…1) I TIVO’d their perfomances this morning, 2) I’ve already watched it 3 times with Delaney…she is learning all the songs with me and 3) I’m actually listening to “Please Don’t Go Girl” as I type.

I have truly enjoyed today’s flashback to my younger, carefree days.  Hope this pic takes you back too!

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“L” is for….

Delaney has learned her letters. Now she is tackling word, letters and a little bit of spelling.  We spend a lot of time saying, “Tell me an animal that starts with an ‘M’.” and “What letter does ‘Daddy’ start with?”.

She is doing a great job (forgive me while I relish a little minute of mommy-pride)

Today, we were talking about the letter “L”. 

Me: “Can you name an animal that starts with the letter “L”.

Delaney: “Ladybug starts with ‘L’.”

Me:  “You’re right!  Anything else?”

Delaney: “Yes….Diego’s friend….LLLLLLinda the LLLLLlama.

Me: “Great job.  What about Lion?”

Delaney: “Yes it does.  Good job, Mommy.  Also….when Daddy loves you…that starts with ‘L’ too.”

Me: (Picture me smiling from ear to ear)  “You’re right….love sure does start with ‘L’.”

Heavenly.

www.ExtraordinaryMommy.com

 

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I tossed my Selfish Genes out the window

In fact…I think my ‘selfish’ genes are dancing around with all of my pre-pregnancy clothes…they have taken one last glance in my direction, mumbled ‘Sucker’ under their breath and are mambo-ing off into the sunset.

You could call this loss of selfishness: Motherlove.  And, I think it just sort of happened.  I might not acutally get to take credit for it entirely….

Fellow Mommys will understand what I am talking about.  When you have a baby….all thoughts of yourself take an automatic backseat.  Most of the time, this happens before you have even realized it. Suddenly you find yourself giving up the last bite of that yummy gooey butter cake you’ve been craving or whipping your own coat off in 40 degree temperatures to make sure your little one is warm enough.

Sound familiar yet?  Maybe these moments will:  There is one piece of over-cooked chicken in the whole batch…guess who eats it?  That’s right, Mommy.  There is a last minute need for cupcakes at your child’s school…who stays up til midnight making them?  You guessed it. Mommy.   Baby can’t sleep…who is camping out on the floor to keep him company?  Oh yes, Mommy.  Your toddler has the stomach flu….who feels it down her back…and doesn’t even run to the nearest shower, but instead keeps the comfort coming?  Yep, Mommy.

Your three year old wants a sip of your water and you know the crumbs from her food are going to end up floating on the surface.  You still share, don’t you?  You are exhausted, but your son really wants you to sing and dance to ‘Ring Around the Rosie’ just onemoretime, soooo…I know you put on your dancing shoes!  You haven’t taken a shower, or, forheavenssake, gone to the bathroom by yourself since 1977, but you still answer, “I’m in here!”….as soon as someone calls your name. A foul ball is aiming for your family and you throw your full body over your child to protect them without covering your own head.

It is like I heard Suze Orman once explain….when the flight attendants remind people to (in the event of a loss of cabin pressure…if the oxygen masks fall from the ceiling) cover their own faces first and then help those around them….they are talking to MOMMYs!!  Because you know our first instinct is to protect our kids.

When was the last time you ate your meal hot? When was the last time you watched what you wanted to see on tv?  Or listened to something other than Radio Disney in the car?  Sure, sure…it is a real party pleaser that we can recite “Dora, Dora, Dora the Exploooorer” at the drop of a hat, and we can tell you who sings “Hakuna Matata”, but since I’m not going to be on “Who’s Smarter than a Pre-Schooler?” any time soon…I can’t exactly classify this as top-notch info.

We give and we love and we give some more.  I, for one, have to admit to missing my selfish genes, just a little (well…maybe sometimes alot) but, I do know I wouldn’t trade my kids. (Scratch that….today, I would have, but most days, I wouldn’t let you have them)  And I do know we wouldn’t really trade any of these moments.  Sometimes you can find the joy in sharing that last bite of dessert…sometimes those late and sleepless nights mean extra hugs and cuddles you don’t normally get during the day.  Maybe I wasn’t supposed to have the big, juciy piece of chicken 🙂  Maybe my knowledge of pre-school songs will come in handy some day.

Today…I hope you realize how extraordinary your love, selflessness and sacrifice truly are.  Today, I hope you take a deep breath and say, “yes…I am extraordinary.”

 www.ExtraordinaryMommy.com

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96 Questions

96…that’s how many questions my three year old asked me today.

And, no, that doesn’t include the ‘whys’.  I figure I’m in the thousands if I get to include the ‘whys’.  So, for counting purposes, I just included the actual questions I was required to answer today.

“Mommy, what are we doing today?”  This is a Delaney favorite…I get it first thing in the morning and then roughly another 4 times throughout the day.  “What are we doing tomorrow?” My carpe diem deprived daughter is always looking to the future.  She MUST know what she has to look forward to.

Like most parents, I get the standards, “What is for breakfast? (lunch, dinner, snack), “Can I watch Dora?”(Why not?) Right, I know, we aren’t counting the ‘whys’! “Can I go outside?”, (No, it is raining again) “Do I really have to take a nap?” (Absolutely) “What are you doing?” (this answer varies, but it is usually fixing whatever toy has just been broken or needs new batteries) “Who are you talking to?” (Daddy, Nana…etc.) and “Will you hold me?” (this is a favorite, BTW)

But these are the most unique of the day:  “Mommy, can we make a cushion pool?” (Pull ALL the cushions off the couch to jump into?  Yes, you can…mainly because I’m THRILLED she asked permission!)  “Are you dying?” (No) “Is Daddy dying?” (No) “Am I dying?” (No) “Is Santa coming tonight?” (No) “Do I like green beans?” (No, but I wish you did) “Can I have a baby sister?” (That would be a negative) “Do you like the frame I gave you for Mother’s Day?” (Of course) “Is your name Ms. Kara?” (Nope…not unless I’ve transformed into a cute 20-something preschool teacher) “Do you know how to spell chair?” (Yes….do you?  Unless chair is now spelled A-I-P-O-I-N, I’m guessing that’s a no)

Oh….I’m just getting warmed up: “Why is it raining?”, “Can I wear flip flops in the rain?”,”Why do I have to wear a sweater?”, “Why can’t I have milk right before bed anymore?”, (leaking pull-ups, folks…leaking pull ups are the bane of my existance) “Why won’t Cooper share with me?”, “Is there a mean witch coming?”,”Why do you like that song?”, “Are those new shoes, Mommy?”, “Can I lay in your bed tonight?”, “Do I have to take a bath?”

Right about now, you are either smiling and nodding your head in understanding the way only a parent of a toddler can….or you are afraid….very afraid. 🙂 

I’ll save you the pain of reading through any more of my sweet girl’s questions….but, don’t you worry…they are ping-ponging through my brain as I type….  (Must take tylenol to prepare for tomorrow’s onslaught!)

www.ExtraordinaryMommy.com

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On Gratitude

It is on a day like today….a cool and gloomy one (yep….it is mid-May and yep, it is cool (low 60’s) and rainy off and on) that I feel compelled to focus on the things that make me happy…the things that inspire gratitude.  So, here goes.

Exercise. Potato salad (I know…doesn’t mix with exercise, but I can’t help it), doing puzzles with my kids, skipping hand in hand with my daughter, cat naps, my IPOD, making bloggy friends, faith, a good book, the phrase “let it be”, monograms, unexpected goodwill, tylenol, the color of raspberries, a new pen, sheets right out of the dryer, knocking items off my ‘to-do’ list, Sandra Boynton books for kids, kissing my husband, hearing my husband say, ‘hi gorgeous’ to Delaney, Santa Barbara, a healthy family, when someone holds the door open for me, feeling organized, cleaning out a messy closet, finding the perfect gift, tea parties, address labels, drinking lots of water, reconnecting with a long-lost friend, the word ‘spectacular’, freckles, watching a movie, having a date-night with my husband, baseball games, toddler hugs and kisses and the fabulous massage I got on Mother’s Day.

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How strong is your faith?

I’m in awe of people who are able to rely COMPLTELY on their faith in times of tragedy and personal crisis.

I’m amazed that, through what must be a very deep pain, one can see a shining light and focus on the good.

Take Heather at Mom4Life as an example.  This is a woman who’s level of faith, strength and composure absolutely robs me of breath.  One week ago, Heather learned that the baby (Sawyer) she was expecting in only 3 weeks, no longer had a beating heart.  In the past 7 days…she has gone from an excited expectant mother to a mother preparing for a funeral.  Late last week, she labored and gave birth to baby Sawyer.  Through it all, she has continued to look for the rainbows through the rain, she has focused on the plan she is certain God has in place and has taken the love and support from friends and strangers (like me) to heart.

It appears to me that her journaling is helping….but it is tremendous to me that she can sound so composed, that she can speak so eloquently and that she is managing to focus on the beauty in her life.

I admire Heather and the many people like her, who are capable of putting their hurt in God’s hands.  I am humbled by the faith they exhibit and the trust they live. 

I am confident there will be loss and pain in my life….I can only hope to be as grounded in faith, as strong, as sure, as Heather is.   Many more prayers are coming your way, Heather.

http://www.ExtraordinaryMommy.com

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I’m joining the party

I can’t help it.  I’m joining the party.  I really do like Mommy blog parties…..lots of new friends to make and fabulous blogs to read.

 

If you are new to visiting me…I’m a mommy to two darling little ones…Delaney is almost 4 and Coop is nearing his big ‘number 2’ birthday. 

I am in love with my husband….  I’m a California girl living in the Midwest. I’m a writer….a talker and, I’d like to think, ‘a doer’.  I like to be busy….and am prone to having trouble saying, ‘no’.  I love to read…I love to travel and wouldn’t know what to do without my family.  I have a new passion: I started a website for mommys…www.ExtraordinaryMommy.com with the hopes of inspiring moms to embrace the ‘extraordinary’ within.  Stop by!  I’d love to know what you think!

I’m happy you came by to visit….leave me a comment…I’d love to stop by to visit you!

www.ExtraordinaryMommy.com

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The days are LONG but the years are SHORT

This just might be my new phrase to live and love by.  It puts ‘parenting’ in one little bitty sentence that packs a real punch.

It was during our beautiful Mother’s Day mass yesterday that our priest used this quote….and since then, I have found myself thinking it over and over again. 

As a mommy, I do find myself stuck in a ‘long day’ rut.  We do many of the same things over and over again….get up, dress the kids, make breakfast, play with the kids, park time, errands, make lunch, naptime, play with the kids, clean the house, clean up the toys, make dinner…and in between all of that there is my work as a referee, expert ‘colorer’ and craft-maker, toy-fixer, laundry fiend, friend, wife, worker….

But when did my little girl learn to say ‘impressive’ in a sentence?  And when did my little boy learn to pull his pants up by himself?  Is it possible they are almost 4 and 2?  Can he really count to 15? And hit a pop-up off a tee?  Can she really do a sommersault with no hands? And kick a soccer ball?  Is she really on a T-Ball team? And when did she learn to rhyme ‘dog’ and ‘fog’?  When did he learn to say ‘too’ after “Mommy, I love you”?  Did I really catch him WALKING up and down the stairs all by himself? Did she really keep my mother’s day present a secret?  Seriously, she can keep a secret?  Was it a mirage….or were they really sitting on the couch together…..her arm around him….his head on her shoulder as she read to him? She isn’t allowed to call me, “Mom” yet, is she?  Isn’t there a minimum age requirement for that?

The minutes are too precious to miss.  The days may sometimes seem long as they are happening, but, wow…I’m confident I will soon blink and they will be pre-teens….and then teenagers….and then adults.  Whoa….sorry….my chest is tightening…need to take a deep breath.

OK…that’s better….focusing on the ‘now’.  Right now, they are both napping.  Right now, I have only a few more minutes before they awake and we play.  Right now, they are still approaching their 4th and 2nd birthdays.  Right now, I’m still Mommy to a couple of toddlers.  Right now, they still giggle when I tickle them.  Right now, they still want to be tucked into bed.  Right now, I’m one of their favorite playmates. Right now, I’m lucky to have been given the gift of learning, “the days are long, but the years are short”.

www.ExtraordinaryMommy.com

 

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